Rapid Fire Dreams

New Treat That Won't Blow My Diet!!

OK, back in the mid/late '80's, my mom tried to get me to eat some of the Weight Watchers frozen dinners... You remember... the ones in the pink boxes where the pink box tasted better than the meal inside???

Well, needless to say, I've been hesitant to try any of the current Weight Watchers "Smart Ones" frozen products. But, last night, at Kroger, something caught my eye. You see, I've NEVER been able to turn down Key Lime pie (Except for Key Lime Pie flavored Cheesecake, a concoction from Satan's kitchen if I've ever tasted one....) or a good Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough treat. These are what I found.... (Click the pictures for links to the info pages...) And they are actually REALLY GOOD! I had the Mint Chocolate Chip last night, and I can't wait to get home tonight and try the Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Sundae.....I'm saving the key lime pie for my Saturday treat!!!

Sixty and Going Strong

No, that's not my age (but I will be one year closer to that next Friday - YUCK!) Sixty is how many pounds I've lost since August. To be exact, it's 61.4lbs!!

Here's the updated chart -> CHART

That's like having "Mini Me" in my belly!!!

New versions of Old Favorites

Well, Sunday night is the premiere of the NEW American Gladiators and I'm pumped!! I can remember dropping what ever I was doing on Saturday afternoons to catch the orginal show in the 90's!

Not only that, but 2008 will be seeing another Old TV favorite coming back... KNIGHT RIDER!!! You can see a teaser trailer HERE!

Oh, and if you're hoping for a new, revamped, Prototype Trans AM (Like the Camaro used for BumbleBee in the Transformers movie), Sorry, KITT is a MUSTANG now! (Pictures) - Well, he is now the Knight Industries THREE Thousand, not that old TWO Thousand model from the 80's! ;-)

More on the new Knight Rider

KnightRideronline.com has updated their site with a new, 2 minute trailer. It's WELL worth the watch. The guy that's playing Michael Knight's son looks JUST LIKE "The Hoff" did - from facial features to curly black hair, black leather jacket and all. In the clip there is a scene where he's threatening KITT that he'll put Sugar in his gas tank!!!

Why I'm called "Wolfman"...

There are several factors that came together to give me that nickname. From always picking the Role of "Ralph the Wolfman" on the old '80's Video game "RAMPAGE" - to the fact that I can howl to the point of having every dog for MILES howling with me.

Most importantly, I had a Cherokee medicine man look me in the eyes, get a shocked look on his face, mutter something in Old Cherokee, and then tell me that I WAS a Wolf, not just that I had a wolf as a guardian spirit. In fact, while I have the wolf within me, I also have the bear and the eagle as guardians.... a very rare, and powerful combination in Native American Circles. When I get my Log home built, I really don't care about the cost, but I plan on commissioning a native American Artist to carve a Bear/Wolf/Eagle Totem pole to guard the entrance!

Not only that, but I've taken a couple of those online "Animal" personality tests, and every one of them comes back like this...

The Animal Archetype Test
Your Score: The Wolf
You scored 27% domestic, 54% gregarious, 25% trickster, and 35% intellect!

Wild, Gregarious, Serious and Emotional: you are the Wolf! Wolf people tend to revere individualism, but retain a predominant sense of family. Wolf represents all aspects of sociability, and the need for variety (in internal and external affairs) to remain healthy. Wolf is a strong symbol of loyalty and patience. Wolf medicine is deeply rooted in the importance of learning through teaching, new ideas, freedom of mind and body, and responsibility for self and others.

This test categorized you based on four different axes of personality, which were then associated with a different animal. The four axes, as well as all possible results are explained below.

Wild/Domestic: This first axis categorizes you based on how much you are drawn to the outdoors, versus how much you are drawn to civilized situations. Domesticity has many shapes and forms, and varies from the joy of dolphins leaping next to a ship to the steadfast loyalty of a family dog.

Gregarious/Solitary: This axis measures how solitary you are. If you scored high, it means that you enjoy the company of other people, while a low score indicates that you prefer a more solitary lifestyle.

Trickster/Serious: This axis measures how well you line up with conventional trickster archetypes. People who fall into this archetype have a sense of humor and an excitable, highly chaotic streak. Scoring low doesn't mean that you don't have a sense of humor; it just means that you probably don't think dynamite is very funny.

Intellectual/Emotional: This last axis determines whether you are more emotional -- acting based on feelings and instinct, or rational and intellectual -- acting more on thought than on your gut feelings.

And from another site....

You Are The Wolf

When a lone wolf is spotted in the wilderness it embodies the energy of freedom. When seen in a pack it embodies a sense of community. If wolf appears to you alone or in a pack it is asking you to acquire the same within your own life. In spite of their negative press wolves are actually friendly, social and highly intelligent.

The wolf's senses are highly developed. Their intelligence is marked with excellent hearing, sense of smell and strong feeling. They are determined as well as cunning and use these skills for the benefit of the pack. The howl of the wolf is primal and penetrating. They howl to find other pack members or to let wolves from outside of the pack know their territory boundaries. If you hear a wolf howl it might be telling you to stand your ground and defend your boundaries.

Wolf teaches you to have a balance between the needs your family has of you and the needs you have for yourself. They are totally loyal to the pack but do not give up their identity to the pack. If wolf appears in your life you are being asked to look at where you are being too dependent and where you may be too independent. In both family and community there needs to be a balance.

Wolves convey much with their bodies. If they are angry, they may stick their ears straight up and bare their teeth. A wolf who is suspicious pulls its ears back and squints. Fear is often shown by flattening the ears against the head. A wolf who wants to play dances and bows playfully. Their body language is symbolic for those with this medicine. Man also uses body language to convey messages. The study of this art can increase perception in those with this totem.

Wolves hunt in packs, relying on endurance to run down weak and older animals. They have been known to run 35 miles a day in pursuit. They are the epitome of stamina and strength. With an extremely well developed societal organization, they act together to hunt and raise their young. They do not fight unnecessarily and often go out of their way to avoid fighting. Sometimes a growl, a glance, a posture is all that is necessary to determine dominance. Wolf teaches those with this medicine to know who you are and to develop strength and confidence in what you do.

I'm Movin' On....

I've had a song on my mind for a few weeks now...I even have these lyrics on my wall, above my computer at work.

Is this what I WANT? NO! But, decisions and actions by other people in my life have left me at a fork in the road. I can choose the simple path, and spend the rest of my life crying over the loss & the hurt.... OR I can choose the hard road, and move on with my life....

I've found you find strength in your moments of weakness
For once I'm at peace with myself
I've been burdened with blame, trapped in the past for too long

I'm movin' on

At last I can see life has been patiently waiting for me
And I know there's no guarantees, but I'm not alone
There comes a time in everyone's life
When all you can see are the years passing by
And I have made up my mind that those days are gone

I'm movin' on

Saturday, in the park...

You'd think it was the 4th of July.....

OK, enough Chicago song references. But, for the 1st of March, it was a BEAUTIFUL day, and other than the temp, you'd think it was the 4th of July. I've had some things on my mind the last couple of weeks... REAL HEAVY things that, I really can't talk to anyone except a couple of really close friends about. At least for now. Anyway, I needed to clear my head, big time. So, I threw my hiking staff in the trunk of the car and headed over to Ft. Yargo State park in Winder and walked the trails for a few hours... Just me, God, my iPod and my Eagle hiking staff... (And my Blackberry, of course!!!). A long walk in nature like that can be as good for the soul as it is for the body.

Speaking of body, just a quick update. The weight loss total is now at 82 lbs since last Labor Day. I had my physical Tuesday and was told I was doing great (for those concerned I may be doing too much, too fast.)...

86 / 5 / 10

Anyone guess what those 3 numbers are?
No, it's not the play call from the winning quarterback....
It's not the combination to my footlocker....
It's definately not the measurements of my ideal woman!!!

Give up?

86 - how many pounds I've lost since Labor Day of last year
5 - the number of pants sizes I've dropped
10 - the number of inches off my waist

A lot done, and nothing accomplished...

I was writing an email to one of my closest friends tonight and I got to thinking about some of the things I've done in my 33 years on this planet...

I've taken a class cinematography taught by Steven Spielberg,
I've taken a trumpet lesson from Doc. Severson,
I’ve shook hands with the President (the first Bush),
I’ve made good friends and lost good friends,
I’ve met Lonestar & Lee Greenwood and had pictures taken with them,
I’ve performed in the half time show of a Bowl game,
I've seen a UFO and a Ghost,
I’ve been to the Olympics,
I’ve walked on the launch pads at Cape Canaveral and seen the shuttle rolling out on its crawler to be blasted into orbit,
I’ve found pearls in oysters that I pulled up from the ocean myself,
I’ve seen Niagara Falls in the snow,
I’ve walked Bourbon Street in New Orleans,
I was blessed to be able to give a sermon in front of a full church when I was only 16,
I’ve seen the sun set over the mountains, and rise over the ocean,
I’ve driven through the Vineyard’s of Ontario, Canada,
I’ve flown a Boing 747 flight simulator,
I’ve rafted class 6 rapids & swam with Dolphins in the wild,
I’ve hiked on the Appalachian Trail & Watched Hailey’s Comet from the top of Tray Mountain on a night so clear I was able to see it with my bare eyes,
I’ve eaten Rattlesnake & Alligator,
I’ve held a fawn in my arms and nursed it with a bottle after its mother was hit by a truck,
I’ve loved and lost,…

I can’t say I’ve done it all, but, if it was over today, I’ve done enough to feel satisfied.

No, I can’t say that I have no regrets… I have a few. Some, I’ll take to my grave.

Yes, I hurt right now. I’ve known pain, plenty of pain in my life. But, pain is part of life.

But, all for all I've done, I feel I have accomplished nothing....

Easter, and the first signs of spring....

I went out for my walk today, dispite the cold wind, it was a beautiful day. And, as I round the bend, about a half mile from my house, I see something that causes me to pause and think (See picture). Some may say "It's just s tree blooming out." But, realize the symbology of it on today, Easter, the day we as Christians celebrate the NEW LIFE given to us by the VICTORY of Jesus over death. There, among the "Dead" (Dormant) trees stood a beautiful, wild, pink Dogwood in full bloom. Just something to think about.

Below is the LEGEND of the Dogwood... (Its just a legend....)

The Legend of the Dogwood

There is a legend, that at the time of the Crucifixion the dogwood had been the size of the oak and other forest trees. So firm and strong was the tree that it was chosen as the timber of the cross. To be used thus for such a cruel purpose greatly distressed the tree, and Jesus, nailed upon it, sensed this, and in His gentle pity for all sorrow and suffering said to it: “Because of your regret and pity for My suffering, never again shall the dogwood tree grow large enough to be used as a cross. Henceforth it shall be slender and bent and twisted and its blossoms shall be in the form of a cross. ..two long and two short petals. And in the center of the outer edge of each petal there will be nail prints, brown with rust and stained with red, and in the center of the flower will be a crown of thorns, and all who see it will remember.”

Oh the Summer-time has come....

Well, not really, yet. It sure feels like it. On my walk yesterday, I had one of my favorite spring time tunes in my head. It's a RARE song to hear as its an Old Celtic Scottish song. (As my family has a lot of Scottish history, this might explin why I love it so!) So, guess my surprise when, at work today, here comes the owner of the company I work for walking down the hall WHISTLING IT!!!

Oh, the summer-time has come
And the trees are sweetly bloomin'
And the wild mountain thyme
Grows around the purple heather
Will ye go, lassie, go?

Refrain:
And we'll all go together,
To pull wild mountain thyme
All around the purple heather;
Will ye go, lassie, go?

I will build my love a tower
By yon pure, crystal fountain,
And it's there I will bring
All the flowers of the mountain;
Will ye go, lassie, go?

Refrain

I will range through the wilds
And the deep land so dreary
And return with the spoils
To the bower o' my dearie;
Will ye go, lassie, go?

Refrain

If my true love will not come
I will surely find another
To pull wild mountain thyme
All around the purple heather;
Will ye go, lassie, go?

Refrain

Oh, the autumn-time is comin'
And the leaves will soon be fallin',
And the blossoms o' the summer
Will soon wither on the mountain;
Will ye go, lassie, go?

Refrain

You and I in a little toy shop....

Today's entry is a little cryptic, because I want to see who's been paying attention. If you get the reference, email me. If you don't, I'll give you a hint check the post from March, 19th below....

You and I in a little toy shop
Buy a bag of balloons
With the money we've got
Set them free at the break of dawn
'Til one by one, they were gone
Back at base, bugs in the software
Flash the message
"Something's out there"
Floating in the summer sky
99 red balloons go by

Leaving the House of Blues

Most of my friends and family know that I've had some very tough battles with depression over the years. And, some people look at the things I've been hit with (like a truck!) and say it's justifiable. We all have those events in our lives that bring us down for a while. But, no matter what reason someone has for GETTING depressed, there is NEVER any excuse for living your life in the House of Blues. Hey, I love B.B. King and the Blues, but I need some upbeat music as well! Life is no different. Many people pay a visit to the House of Blues, saddle up to the bar and just stay there.

Well, starting Sunday, Pastor Tony is going to be starting a new series about "Leaving The House of Blues" and I encourage ALL of my friends and family to come to Fusion Church with me for the next few weeks. Even if you don't deal with depresssion yourself, you know someone that does (Hey, you know me, that counts!!) and you will get a great perspective on what they go through and how to help them. And, if someone you care about fights this fight, BRING THEM. If not for you, do it for them. Learn that God's love can overcome ANY problem.

I don't care if it's a 2 hour drive one way for you, the next few weeks will be worth it, I PROMISE. If you need directions, email me (or click here and put in your address).

I hope to see everyone of you there Sunday. I'll be out, greeting people at my usual station in the middle court yard, so I'll know who's there or not!!! (Just for saying that, I bet Greg is going to move me to another post.)

100!

• The number of years in a century
• A 100 year old person is known as a centenarian. George Burns. Bob Hope, and United States Senator Strom Thurmond were among those who had lived to 100.
• The number of pounds in an American short hundredweight
• The United States Senate has 100 Senators
• The number of subunits into which many of the world's currencies are divided; for example, one euro is one hundred cents and one Pound Sterling is one hundred pence
• The number of tiles in a standard Scrabble set
• The denomination of the U.S. hundred-dollar bill with Benjamin Franklin's portrait; the "Benjamin" is the largest U.S. bill in print
• The denomination of American savings bonds with Thomas Jefferson's portrait
• The denomination of American treasury bonds with Andrew Jackson's portrait
• Hundred Days, aka the Waterloo Campaign
• "The First Hundred Days" is an arbitrary benchmark of a President of the United States' performance at the beginning of his term
• 100 is the HTTP status code indicating that the client should continue with its request
• STS-100 Space Shuttle Endeavour launched April 19, 2001
• NASDAQ-100 is a stock market index of 100 of the largest domestic and international non-financial companies listed on the NASDAQ stock exchange
• In English slang, adding the number 100 to a particular skill or subject denotes introductory knowledge ("Physics 100", "Soccer 100"), akin to the name of a first year university subject.
• Games 100 is an annual listing of the year’s top games
• The Time 100 is a list of the 100 most influential people in the world, as assembled by Time. The list has developed into an annual event.
• 100 Grand Bar (formerly known as $100,000 Bar) is a candy bar produced by Nestlé
• Pope Valentine succeeded Pope Eugene II to become the 100th Pope in August 82
• The number of yards in an American football field (not including the end zones).
• The number of runs required for a cricket batsman to score a Century, a significant milestone
• The record number of points scored in one NBA game, set by Wilt Chamberlain of the Philadelphia Warriers on March 2, 1962
• The Freedom 100 is an Indy Pro Series auto race held the Friday before the Indianapolis 500 at the Indianapolis Motor Speedway
• The 2004 World Series between the Boston Red Sox and the St. Louis Cardinals was the 100th Fall Classic
• San Diego Chargers running back LaDainian Tomlinson became the fastest player in NFL history to reach 100 touchdowns on November 19, 2006
• Ryan Howard of the Philadelphia Phillies became the fastest MLB player to reach 100 home runs on June 27, 2007
• The minimum distance in yards for a Par 3 on a golf course

OR - I could just come out and say it's Official, I've lost 100 lbs since Labor Day of last year.....

  
Click Image for a full size version....

All hands to the escape pods....

No, I'm not giving up and abandoning ship. "Escape Pod" is the name of a podcast I subscribe to and I'm really enjoying. First, what's a "Podcast" some of you may be asking. Think of it as a radio broadcast that you subscribe to and download to your PC to listen to. In this case, every Thursday they post a new, Sci-Fi Short story (usually Hugo Award Nominee's) that you can download. You can go to the site and just download the MP3 file, or if you use a program like iTunes, you can "subscribe" and iTunes will download it for you automatically and even sync it to your iPod. You don't have to have and iPod or other mp3 player, you can listen to them on your PC.

Myself, I like to listen to them on my walks.

Now, my buddy Greg has been trying to read more and more books. I used to be able to digest a book like nothing. I could take in a 450 page paperback in a weekend. But, after the accident in 2004, I have trouble PHYSICALLY reading for more than about 15 mins at a time. I get a bad headache and it's not my eyes. So, I have been turning more and more to audio books so I can still get my fix.

FYI - our Church has a podcast of some of our best messages, and Pastor Tony just uploaded the first of the "Leaving the House of Blues" HERE.

Oh, and for those of you that still like to read, or for those like Pastor Tony that are lucky enough to have an Amazon Kindle (on my wishlist, FYI!), there is a bonus. Click the link to the Hugo Awards page in the text above and you can download eBook versions of some of the stories to read.

Who am I?

Who am I?

My life has given me a lot of time and reason to ponder that question over the last 4 years. I can say, I still do not know the answer. But, here is what I do know:

• I'm loyal, to a fault. My friends are my most valuable asset and I stand BESIDE them 100% (not behind, beside!)
• I'm driven. My weight loss has shown me that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!
• I'm stubborn! I get something in my mind, it's hard for me to give it up. Heck, you can hit me with an SUV and it won't stop me. It might slow me down, but it won't stop me. I know, it's been tried!
• I'm a lover, I just don't have anyone to share my love with.
• I'm a big kid at heart.
• I'm too quick to give my trust to someone up front, but slow to give it back if it's every betrayed.
• I'm a man of my word. I make a commitment or promise, I do everything in my power to keep it.
• I'm mean what I say. I don't play word games, I don't tell people what I think they want to hear. I don't try to manipulate people with my words.
• I'm brutally honest. You ask my opinon, I'm going to give it to you, even if its not what I think you want to hear.
• I'm not afraid to cry when I need to & I know how to be strong when someone needs me to be.
• I'm scared of what's around the corner, but that does not stop me from stepping around the corner to face it.
• I like chocolate more than I like to admit.
• I like Elvis more than I WANT to admit.
• I'm not afraid to admit that I enjoyed watching "Chick Flicks with my ex... Not because of the movie, but because it was something to do together.
• I can cook, sew and I'm not too bad at giving pedicures!
• I hate a messy house, but I'm too lazy to clean!
• I'm easily amused, but even more easily bored!

Do you have anything to add?? Email me!

What's a post about who I am without a baby picture when I was just a pup of a wolfman?? ;)

I'm still alive....

I'm sorry it's been nearly 2 months since my last post. Things have been very hectic in my life, and not hectic good... Health Scares and surgery for my dad, betrayed by yet someone else I thought cared about me (Someone that's been part of my life for 20 years), the birth of a son I wanted but who's not mine, I've lost my home to forclosure, and then, this weekend topped the cake.

Over the years, I've helped many friends move. The other week, I emailed the ones I felt I could count on to repay the favor, since I'm all alone now. I know the email went out, as I did have a few replies about being out of town for the holiday weekend (As expected). And, I could see in their replies, the names of everyone I sent it to. But, I did not get back a single offer to help... yesterday morning, it was just me, my fathers Tahoe/trailer and a pair of handtrucks. Three loads to storage, and so much more to do.

2 years....

Two years ago today (09/22/2006) my then wife of 10 1/2 years, who was pregnant with our first child, and I signed the closing paperwork on our first home. We were excited. Yeah, we were out of pocket over $20,000 down payment and closing, but we didn't care! We had a new home and a baby on the way

Less than a month later, on October 14th, we lost the baby. The same week that Patti lost her (Step)Grandmother to cancer.

Less than a year after our closing (Labor Day, 2007), Patti walks out the door. I won't go into details, but our marriage was over. By December, 2007, the divorce was final.

In March of 2008, I find out that I may be a daddy, but those hopes are dashed not long after the little fella is born in July.

And, how do I "Celebrate" my 2 years after closing? Cleaning my belongings out of the house. I have been given until October 18th, then I must turn the keys over to the mortgage company.

I sit here writing this in my "New place" - an 11x12 room with nothing of my own my my clothes, my computer, my cats and my TV. Everything I own is packed into storage. The bed I am laying my head on is not even mine. I have moved it all my self. No help from my so called friends. No response to emails or phone calls. Emails some claim they never got... but I have the Read Receipts that say otherwise.

Well, there is ONE thing else I have here that is my own... the tears running down my cheek.....

Running on God Power

Today Pastor Tony was talking about how we have to depend on God's power to help us, how we can't run on our own power for long. I've never doubted that. What, I never knew was just how long someone could run on God Power only.

See, my batteries feel dead... not dead as in they need to be recharged, but dead as in they won't hold a charge of their own anymore. Like an old laptop I have that runs fine on the external power supply, but as soon as you pull that plug, it sputters and dies. I've been running on nothing BUT God's power for a couple of years now. It's what gets me out of bed in the morning, cause I know that I lost the will to do it myself a long time ago. It's what dives me to work out, and to lose weight. If it had been up to me, I probably would have put ON 130 lbs in this last year, not lost it.

No, I have not run off of my own power at all for about 4 years now. My batteries are dead, worn out, shattered and leaking acid...

Just pray that no one trips over my God power cord and unplugs me before I can find replacement batteries...

Weight Loss Help

OK, I get a lot of questions about my weight loss. Honestly, there is one big secret.... LOGGING EVERYTHING. What I eat, what I do (excercise), my weight....

I use a program called "CalorieKing Nutrition and Exercise Manager" that I bought for $45 last year. Let me just say, I highly recommend it. What this program did for me was make me realize WHAT I was eating. I mean, to come home and log that I ate a Double Quarter Pounder w/Cheese and Large Fries for lunch and see my carbs, calories and fat count shoot into the red, well beyond my "Limits" for the day would blow my mind. And, I would still have to do soemthing for dinner. What that did was make me start thingking about foods BEFORE I ate them. I made me change my eating habits. No, this program does not tell you what you can or can't eat. It just keeps track of what you do eat and makes you think about it.

Now, there were other programs out there, but CalorieKing just gave me the biggest bang for the buck. However, the software program from FitDay.com came in a close second. Now, I know a lot of you are on a budget, or just don't want to spend the money. Well, the people over at FitDay have recently begun offering a "Lite" version of their program for FREE. It's web based, nothing to download. It does not have all the bells and whistles, but the basics are there. I can tell you, if they had this last year, I would have used it instead of plopping out the $45 for CalorieKing.

I still wholly endorse the CalorieKing software, and recommend it. But, for my friends that are wanting to lose 10-100 lbs, and want something cheap or free to try, give the FitDay Free version a try!